Unsticking My Vocation

People get stuck sometimes; emotionally, physically, intellectually stuck. I know, I have been there, stuck like anyone else.  Knowing what I should be doing, WANTING to be doing that right thing, and still, unable to move forward, or worse yet, doing the wrong thing. St Paul wrote, “For the good which I will, I do not; but the evil which I will not, that I do.” (Rom 7:19).  I relate, not so much that the path I am on is evil, but that it is merely the wrong path. Much better then that I be stuck for in being stuck I come closer to moving in the correct path.  But how do I unstick?

First, I pray for guidance to discern wisely. I say with St. Josemaria Escriva, “Jesus, whatever you want, I love!”

How do I know what Jesus wants of me. The clues are present in myself already. Sometimes just praying quietly before the blessed Sacrament in Adoration will bring to the surface of my mind just the right way.  Sometimes I have to journal pages and pages over a period of days, all the while praying and returning again to Adoration.

Sometimes I must do more, and currently that more is working through a secular book on reclaiming one’s creativity titled, THE ARTISTS WAY.  I insert Catholic belief about God anywhere the author writes about a deity, and remake any prayers she suggests so that they conform with Catholic Theology, and I find the program is very helpful to me.

This week, a quote jumped out at me:

“Fill in the form. What can you do right now, in your life as it is currently constituted? Do that thing.”[p.148 The Complete Artists Way].

So simple, and yet, how many of us think we can only do something for God, AFTER we reach some other goal? We say, AFTER the kids are grown, or AFTER we finish college, or AFTER we lose the weight, or AFTER we retire.  We should be doing what St. Josemaria Escriva wrote:

“Ask yourself many times during the day: Am I doing at this moment what I ought to be doing?” (THE WAY #772)

and

“It takes only a second. Before starting anything ask yourself: What does God want of me in this? Then, with divine grace, do it!”(THE WAY #778)

I can do one small thing.  One thing that must be done but do it with great love and an eye toward pleasing Christ. One thing that is extra, new, that challenges me to make good on my dreams. I seek in prayer for the humility to do whatever small thing possible right now.  I do it.

The Artists’ Way also says,

“Large changes occur in tiny increments. It is useful to think in terms of a space flight: by altering the launch trajectory very slightly, a great difference can be made over time.”[p.148 The Complete Artists Way]

It is important to be kind to yourself when you are stuck in your vocation. Large changes are like saying we’ll do something AFTER.  Instead, each day pick a tiny thing, something small, that you can do right now. Be humble as Christ was humble so that you don’t say, “It is too little.” and stay stuck.

Today, I write a couple of blog posts ahead. It is for me, small, to write for my blog. I am meant to write and so I un-stick, and write what I can about getting unstuck. My vocation begins to creak out of the mud and roll forward slightly.  I filled in my form for today, and that is enough.

Dear Lord, thank You for the writings of St. Josemaria Escriva who wrote so MUCH about vocations. Thank you for the writer of the Artists’ Way. Thank You for providing help when I need it, in whatever form I most need right then. Please guide me to serve You better. Amen.

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